Friday Funny – Moon Car suggestion

Suggestion boxes are another great opportunity for stupidity and humor. I suggest a Moon Car. Its just a good, all-around general suggestion.

I also put in another suggestion for a “couch that can drive places.”

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From the roof tops

Sometime during the heavy snowfall (and subsequent snow-days) of the winter of 2015 I decided the roof of the unused building across from Callahan was disappointingly bleak (perhaps I was suffering cabin-fever?). So I added a nice message for my fellow dorm-mates and school employees.

Yeah, this one was probably on the more risky side of silly things I’ve done, all things considered, but I was safe about it. Anyways, WHOOOHOOO FOR SNOW DAYS!

Invisible Hands

Since its inception, the NKU Honors living community hall in Callahan has a had a neat end of year tradition where all residents add their handprints to one brick of the J-wing wall and put there name in between. I of course, took this structured creative outlet and subverted it in some small way. Freshman year, I utilized the concept of blank-space and made my handprints almost the exact same color as the background.
My hope is that for years to come, the eyes of bypassing honors students will automatically be drawn to the puzzling blank space in the center of the wall, and upon closer inspection, be even more puzzled by the hand prints that are simply a shade lighter than the background.
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To that end, I would consider my work a success.

 

Godzilla for Boone County Destroyer

This is probably the longest continuous shenanigan I have done. For the past 2 years, I have been frequently updating a Facebook page called “Godzilla For Boone County City Destroyer,” including making the wonderful Florence water tower stomping GIF. Over the last few weeks, I have been paying for Facebook ads for my gag page to appear to very targeted audiences in Boone County, to the point where hopefully these people are pretty much seeing the ad all the time lol We ended up getting a lot of shares on the ad and plenty of new likes and laughs.
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We also did Door-to-door canvasing, thanks to the Godzilla costume I purchased this summer and have since been upgrading fursuit-style into a real Godzilla costume.


The canvasing wasn’t as successful as possible due to the fact that nobody was really available to help me with it the week before the election. we did it really last minute, but we still got quite a few confused looks and good laughs for it. Sadly none of the videos turned out well, so I’m not gonna bother posting them, but I will share with you the script of talking points we kept on the clip board for use while canvasing.

Greeting:
“hello Sir/Madam, Do you have a minute to talk about the upcoming local election for City Destroyer?”

No: “We’re sorry to bother you, please have a wonderful and smashing day.”

Yes/What: “Godzilla is running for office of City Destroyer in November on behalf of The G.O. M. party, the Gigantic Outraged Monstrosities party. The time has come for serious candidates to step forward in Boone County, and to step ON Boone County.”

Experience:

“Are you aware of Godzilla’s experience as a public servant? Over the past 70 years, He has personally worked with numerous high ranking military officials of the Japanese and US military on several large projects. Together, they ensured that maximum crushing occurred in places like Tokyo and NYC. Now, its time for Boone County.”

Go into policies from here.

Policies:
“While Godzilla’s main platform is on top of your house or place of business, there are a few things Godzilla has fought for through out his life, primarily himself.

Godzilla is pro-life. For his life, not yours.
Godzilla is in favor of all green initiatives, like himself.
Godzilla plans to destroy the heroin epidemic, along with everything else.
Godzilla supports the second amendment, bullets only make him stronger.
Godzilla has big plans for restructuring the economy, as well as the topography.
Godzilla wants to eliminate unnecessary spending, as well as spending at all.
Godzilla will make nuclear waste management is a large priority.
Godzilla wants to Make America Great Again, as great as it was before it was colonized by man.
Godzilla fights against growth of big business, Godzilla has fought plenty of bigger enemies, like Mothra.”

Opponent: “Godzilla’s opponent, the incumbent Ebola Virus has not done what he has promised 2014. He has not reaped destruction to our society, Godzilla is tired of politicians who play these games.”

Qualification: “it is true that some have questioned Godzilla’s birth affecting his candidacy. This is merely a political tactic. Godzilla was born in 1952 at Bikini atoll, a US military base.”

Other office: “Godzilla is a public servant. he has stated that he will also accept a write in position as Boone County District 5 Stomptroller.”


Closing: 
“In closing, Godzilla is a loving mother who desires to represent the needs of Boone County…’s destruction.
Godzilla seeks to unite Northern Kentuckians, that way they are easier to find and crush.
Godzilla’s goal is to eliminate Boone County’s Carbon Footprint and replace it with his own.
A vote for Godzilla is a vote for change. BIG change.

We hope to hear your voice at the voting booth, screaming in terror for Godzilla. Thank you for your time.”

If they are responding positively, before leaving ask if we can have a quick photo op with them shaking hands with Godzilla. if they agree, also ask if they have a baby that Godzilla can kiss. Because, you know, it would be good for his image.

  • Sadly no one had a baby Godzilla could kiss.

I also designed a chat bot for the Facebook page, which you can check out by going to the page and clicking “message” and type any message to Godzilla and see how he responds! Its pretty fun and was a good learning experience for me to try out.

I even wrote an editorial to send into the Boone County Enquirer for the election day paper, but I forgot to submit it before the deadline (PS how am I an honors student in college!?).

Unfortunately though, Godzilla informed us on Wednesday that he had lost the election. He mad a very gracious move in conceding to his opponent, 2016’s biggest fear: “Impending Race War.”
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Sad, but clearly the people have spoken. they are not ready for true destruction yet. So it looks as though Godzilla will be seeking the office again in the next election! What a true public monstrosity.

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Roar.

More Dress Silliness

A few times a year these same crazy street “preachers” come to campus. I say crazy and “preachers” because they really couldn’t be farther from Christ followers, so I won’t even dignify them by calling them that.  From what I understand, these guys make a living by baiting people to assault them and then sue the venue or the assaulter for large amounts of money. Its clear they are saying the most outlandish and offensive things they can, regardless of if it has anything to do with a radical Biblical interpretation or not, simply to illicit a response.

The best policy is to just ignore them and not validate their pretend preaching. But sometimes its important to make onlookers (which there are always alot of) realize just how silly what they are saying is, which is exactly what I did.

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This sign has paid for itself several times over by now.

I just jokingly stood there and asked people for their opinion of the color. The overall consensus was that it was white and gold (initiate disagreement). The “preacher” never commented, but he did inform us that Harambe deserved to die, so theres that.

So at the end of the day gang, always remember, if it doesn’t sound like good news, then its not the Gospel! 

The Debate Tweets

So NKU informatics department streamed a live feed of the first 2016 Presidential debate in our Digitorium. They also had a live voting count and a live twitter comment feed on screen… Its as if they assumed we wouldn’t hijack it for Trump and Harambe memes!
Or at least thats what I did with it.

Every single tweet got a chorus of laughter from the theater! Thrilling to say the least. It made the debate buffoonery go down much easier.

Here are a few of the tweets, all from my various random fake twitter accounts for shenanigans (these accounts will be featured in several other shenans in the future!)14522255_1236731093035444_1779258818_o

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Changing Sorority Girl’s Car Paint Gang Signs

Temporary car paint is only supposed to be left on for a few days to a few weeks at a time. It can actually permanently stain if you leave it on for too long!
Since a lot of the sorority and fraternity students at college were leaving this paint on their windows on for months at a time (or in some cases, as long as 4 years), I decided the least I could do is help them out with a little gag.

Basically I just changed their frat or sorority (gang sign) letters to different Greek letters in the same place. Others, like the one in the picture above, had their propaganda statements written on them, so I spell checked them. You know, to help them out. They are in college after all.

Most of them noticed and changed them back pretty quickly, but I love the idea of someone just driving around, then looking in their rear view mirror and realizing “WHAT I’M NOT IN OMICRON SIGMA GAMMA!”